| Apr. 12th, 2006 @ 04:46 pm Bullshit. |
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Maybe I should slam a few more doors? Hm?
Is it petty?
Probably.
I don't give a fuck.
Nope.
I have to move.
I need a place to live.
This is an unsavory business, moving from place to place. I'm going to be drawing the attention of the government at this rate.
Kat is here. She's needs to fucking leave. And not with Ian.
I've about had it with this bullshit.
Had it up to fucking here.
And you know what...
Everyone always thinks I'm attacking them.
I love my friends.
I truly do.
I want to see them go places, and do things.
And when I "attack" them its not because I hate them, like some of them stupidly seem to think, but because of concern, and their inability to listen to advice or grousing.
So here's some advice, and I'm not even going to bother limiting myself from profanity, cruel remarks, hurtful words or anything else. Because you know what? I don't care. Blame me for hurt feelings. Whatever makes you feel like the fucking good guy.
Excuse me for being fucking observant and realistic. Huh? Yeah.
Bryan: Nothing. Nothing to say, nothing to complain. Count yourself lucky, because I'm on a goddamn emotional rampage. You're doin' right by Bekah, and you've pulled through and come back to us. Props to you. Keep up the good work and thou shalt not face mine wrath. Just don't expect too much from me. Apparently I'm a shitty friend.
Chase: Don't make promises you don't intend to keep. Don't say things if you think even just a LITTLE that you might not be able to hold up on it. Help me help us. We need a home, and goddammit don't leave this shit up to me. If you're leaving the state, and have no intention of holding a home here, then fucking let me know. I need to make decisions for my life too, and now I have Ian underwing. I'm not a fucking Mom but I'll do what I have to to get my friends set up, that includes you. Don't wash out on me.
Justin: Leave Jessica alone. If you've got a bone that you need to do something about, you've got two lovely ladies in waiting, Ms. Right Hand and her sister, Ms. Left Hand. Even if you're just joking, don't turn into an atypical male chauvinistic pig. You were supposed to be better than that, Justin. Take your nose down a notch so you can see past your upper lip and you might find yourself a real woman, instead of some fancy foreigner of someone elses girl. If you select only from poor stock, then everything you end up with is of poor quality. If you think you deserve better, then aim for better.
Roy: I've bit my cheek enough. There's only so much I can overlook. Your life revolves around the computer. You acnnot live without it, and worse of all, you cannot exist without Neopets. You can say whatever you like, but if that website were to shut down, it'd be the end of the world. You get way too emotional about it. You can rarely be bothered to come out of the bedroom for group things, but if the internet goes down, you'll sure bee-line your way into Phil's room to see things get fixed. You sleep all day - surely because Chase works peculiar hours and you have to follow along and stay up with them. But you are -home- all day. Which lead me to my point. You do not work, why then, can you not do housework? What exactly keeps you from it? Ian shoul not be put to task and clean everything himself. He even has the courtsey to do you and Chase's laundry from time to time when he cleans the bathroom. Please explain? You do not have a job, and if that's fine with Chase, that's fine with me. But that's no excuse for you to do nothing. I'm sorry.
I've essentially worked since I was twelve. I've broken my back taking care of my sisters and doing everything under my mother's whim. When I see someone doing nothing at all, I cannot fathom it. And I'm certain to get a poorly aimed retort for all I'm saying here, and my point will be entirely missed, and you'll defend yourself to the end, as is your right. Chase is sure to snarl contempt at me too. I'm willing to face the explosion in light that your generally immobile existence concerns me a great deal. It isn't HEALTHY Roy. You're going to let yourself fall apart. you're going to let your joints get worse, you're going to gain weight that will be impossible to lose with inactivity, and you're doing terrors to your inner health. You've got a poor constitution already! You're ALWAYS sick, Roy. PLEASE for the love of God do something. I'm so bloody fucking sick of crying over friends. So fucking tired of it you have NO goddamn idea.
Bekah: You've taken leaps and bounds. Don't let a little thing here and there rattle your wits. Don't think too poorly of me after this. You've always had a habit of seeing through my little poorly arranged masks. I'm not a hateful person, really. The ony love I understand is tough love, I suppose. But here's this. Hurry up and fly free, Bek... You shouldn't be at home... You should be doing something...exciting. I don't know. You should be exploring. Take Bryan with you, of course. Send me postcards from Wonderland.
Ian: I'm gonna pound your fucking face in if I catch Kat on my bed one more time. She already busted your goddamn bed, don't think I'm gonna keep my mouth shut a moment more if she's on my mattress. I'm gonna cut your fucking hair and shave your goddamn beard, you stupid lout! If you dislike her to the point of verbal abuse when she's not here, grow a set of balls and tell her to GO AWAY! I can't tell her not to come over if I still have to assume she's your inamorato. What the hell do you need me to spell it out for you?! IAN! CHRIST MAN! DO YOURSELF A FAVOR! And don't expect me to handle things for you! Please please! I pay your rent. You understand the incredible step that is for me? Do you understand how IMMENSELY stupid of me that is? I'm not even going to ask for the money back, and not ask for anymore payment than you getting your ass in gear, finishing your education and getting a bloody JOB. I AM NOT YOUR GIRLFRIEND. I AM YOUR GIRLFIEND. FIEND. HATEFUL AND BILE-BITTER! And I am becoming progressively less amused with this entire charade. Tell me the goddamn truth about you and Kat, or get rid of her. I take in stray animals, and stray people on occasion. But this feline is well on her way to being euthanized.
Mike: Fine. Move. I'm tired of you trying to sway my opinions. I'm tired of you acting like a tragic hero. I'm tired of you looking down at me and smiling that ENFURIATING SMILE that positively reeks of the words "Silly girl". I would clout you if you weren't so much larger than myself. As it is I'm sore tempted to have my mother beat you.
Andy: There's a flatline. Can you hear it? Its ringing in my ears.
Phil: I don't appreciate hearing that you think I don't like you. I wouldn't live here if I didn't. But apparently some people don't understand things plain as day. And I do not appreciate at all, you blaming anyone here for your problems. You need therapy for problems that have little to nothing to do with myself or others present. And for the record, I -want- you to go to your new home, and enjoy that kind of freedom and relocation. I do not want you to either truly think, or pretend, that you are held back by any obligations to friends. Its insulting. You need to move on, so do it.
Matt: YOU GET DOWN HERE RIGHT NOW AND START SOLVING PROBLEMS LIKE YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO! I'M NOT GOOD AT THIS SHIT1 DAMMIT! And uh...congrats on the supervisor job...and...stuff. Whee you're gay! =D
To myself: You're a cruel goddamn bitch, everyone hates you a little, even if they love you a lot. That niggling despisal is enough to make or break friendships. But you're a tought kid. you've been through some shit. If they haven't learned to accept you, then they need to learn to respect you. If they can't do that, then you'll have to move on, won't you?
I should become a fucking hermit in the Alps or something. Live in a cave. Fight bears.
I grow weary of these games. Things need to kick up. Life and times are a-changin'. Relocation may be good for us all. Maybe I'm suffering from my usual...I always get worse the longer I stay in a place. Until I find myself a REAL home, I'll never be able to find a since of peace and stillness.
Wrath.
GLORIOUS WRATH.
Today's rant was brought to you by the letter F, and the letter U. |
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